7 Steps Back to Joy!
Joy seems more complicated as I age. How did my simple mind or heart find endless reservoirs of it then, but fail to even recognise the slightest semblance of it now? So I got to thinking and writing, and this list was born.
Complied somewhat from my old, or rather, young self's point of view, I can see what I've lost, and gained. I did these naturally (albeit idealistically at times), even ignorantly, with no premeditated intentions or true awareness years ago, but haven't allowed myself to recently. Perhaps I punish myself for reasons uncertain.
I now want to recapture my joy. Or rather nurture my reservoirs back to health. :)
I used to / want to:
1. Be amazed at & thankful for all my senses/sensations:
How a breeze feels on my skin. How far I can hear. How wonderful morning smells. How refreshing clean water tastes. How beautifully designed innocent insects are. How much I have to be thankful for.
2. Laugh heartily and look for kind laughter:
Hearing sincere benevolent laughter really makes my day. (I have heard malicious ones which seem to slowly poison my memories. Go away!)
3. Smile:
Even for no reason. Maybe even let a happy random melody accompany me as a mental/emotional soundtrack as I smile my way through the weeks! Through the rest of my life!
4. Deeply breathe in goodness, healing, peace and light:
I have breathed in light but not tried goodness and peace. Light brings with it warmth so it always helped me when I was physically feeling cold. But now I want to breathe it deep into my cells and molecules. I also want to imagine my whole body, all my cells, even my toenails and tips of my hair, breathing in goodness but smart enough to hold their breaths at negativity. And then radiate and give back this goodness and love to the world and to others.
5. Be amazed at the whole ecosystem:
A drop of water in my cup was the same drop that fell as rain into a river near me a decade ago, and the same drop that floated downward from the sky as a snowflake on a majestic mountain 50 years ago, and was also in the Nile a hundred years ago. Perhaps cleopatra drank this same drop, or Jesus changed it into wine. I bet it was also one of the drops of water from the deluge, and it now gives life. Now let's take a look at a caterpillar, a tree and its fruit. Who planned it all? Isn't there a reason for everything?
6. Be grateful:
Not the kind that stems from the misfortunes of others (how sad!). But truly grateful that I am even experiencing this moment in full lucidity. So many people just exist, rushing through life. Why do they want to get to the end so badly? (Not that the end is bad at all.) This kinda links back to number 1, but to be more specifically thankful for my lessons, the universe and/or God (I personally believe in God), and how I fit into the grand scheme, if there is one.
7. Pray or meditate:
(Not for anything; in fact, for nothing!) And drop all worries and the weight of the world while at it. Just be weightless; be nothing (and maybe one with everything in harmony all at once, like feeling how small I am in the milky way). Don't feel responsible for anything at that time. Let God and/or the universe be in charge. Know that they are and I never really was! Don't think of tomorrow, work, bills, invoices, paychecks, plans. Just let time stop, or let it cease to exist. So easy to do, and so difficult all at once. Maybe then, when my mind and heart is silent and still, the divine will speak to my soul.
Complied somewhat from my old, or rather, young self's point of view, I can see what I've lost, and gained. I did these naturally (albeit idealistically at times), even ignorantly, with no premeditated intentions or true awareness years ago, but haven't allowed myself to recently. Perhaps I punish myself for reasons uncertain.
I now want to recapture my joy. Or rather nurture my reservoirs back to health. :)
I used to / want to:
1. Be amazed at & thankful for all my senses/sensations:
How a breeze feels on my skin. How far I can hear. How wonderful morning smells. How refreshing clean water tastes. How beautifully designed innocent insects are. How much I have to be thankful for.
2. Laugh heartily and look for kind laughter:
Hearing sincere benevolent laughter really makes my day. (I have heard malicious ones which seem to slowly poison my memories. Go away!)
3. Smile:
Even for no reason. Maybe even let a happy random melody accompany me as a mental/emotional soundtrack as I smile my way through the weeks! Through the rest of my life!
4. Deeply breathe in goodness, healing, peace and light:
I have breathed in light but not tried goodness and peace. Light brings with it warmth so it always helped me when I was physically feeling cold. But now I want to breathe it deep into my cells and molecules. I also want to imagine my whole body, all my cells, even my toenails and tips of my hair, breathing in goodness but smart enough to hold their breaths at negativity. And then radiate and give back this goodness and love to the world and to others.
5. Be amazed at the whole ecosystem:
A drop of water in my cup was the same drop that fell as rain into a river near me a decade ago, and the same drop that floated downward from the sky as a snowflake on a majestic mountain 50 years ago, and was also in the Nile a hundred years ago. Perhaps cleopatra drank this same drop, or Jesus changed it into wine. I bet it was also one of the drops of water from the deluge, and it now gives life. Now let's take a look at a caterpillar, a tree and its fruit. Who planned it all? Isn't there a reason for everything?
6. Be grateful:
Not the kind that stems from the misfortunes of others (how sad!). But truly grateful that I am even experiencing this moment in full lucidity. So many people just exist, rushing through life. Why do they want to get to the end so badly? (Not that the end is bad at all.) This kinda links back to number 1, but to be more specifically thankful for my lessons, the universe and/or God (I personally believe in God), and how I fit into the grand scheme, if there is one.
7. Pray or meditate:
(Not for anything; in fact, for nothing!) And drop all worries and the weight of the world while at it. Just be weightless; be nothing (and maybe one with everything in harmony all at once, like feeling how small I am in the milky way). Don't feel responsible for anything at that time. Let God and/or the universe be in charge. Know that they are and I never really was! Don't think of tomorrow, work, bills, invoices, paychecks, plans. Just let time stop, or let it cease to exist. So easy to do, and so difficult all at once. Maybe then, when my mind and heart is silent and still, the divine will speak to my soul.
posted by yeriller at 2:23 AM
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